My two oldest grandchildren who are siblings were chosen as “Students of the Month” in September. I pondered about how to praise a grandchild. I don’t feel like the way I praised my children was as effective as I would have liked so I want to try a different method of praise. I think one of the good points of being a grandparent is possessing a greater ability to approach a grandchild with more wisdom due to the recognition of past mistakes.
How to Praise a Grandchild
I had the thought the best way “how to praise a grandchild” is to give praise that helps them look inside of themselves with self-love.
Instead of saying the usual phrases like:
- “Good Job”
- “We are proud of you”
- “You are so smart”
I wrote them a letter and asked them the question, “Are you proud of yourselves? You certainly should be!”
Teachers who have taught them useful things
I then asked them if they would write us a letter about those who have taught them useful things throughout their life so we could read their stories over and over again. I did this to help them gain a greater appreciation for those who are helping them learn, progress and to ultimately achieve their heart’s desires.
Courage to keep trying
I also asked them, “Have you ever felt like giving up but found the courage to keep trying?” Thinking about this question may help build their confidence by remembering times when they didn’t want to keep trying, but they chose not to give up. Because they didn’t give up, they may recognize this could be one of the reasons they were chosen as “Students of the Month”!
Praise with details of their accomplishment
If possible, praising your grandchildren with specifics about their accomplishment may help them think about the details of what they achieved.
The way I praised my children was a model for them to look outside of themselves for praise. This type of praise can lead to a fear of making future mistakes and losing their status among friends and family. I used to compliment my children using general phrases like the following:
- “You are such a good kicker!”
- “You’re my girl.”
- “I am so proud of you!”
- “You’re the best!”
Superior ways to give praise would include more detailed statements similar to the following phrases:
- “The way you kicked that ball was interesting. Could you show me how you did that?”
- “I loved the way you played the song, Fur Elise. Who taught you how to play it like that? Could you play it for me one more time?”
- “I love your choice of colors. Why did you choose those colors? Tell me all about your picture.”
- “Wow, you are fast at calculating numbers. What is your secret? Could you teach me how to do that?”
This type of praise helps a child remember moments of strength and to be reminded of their special interests and talents.
Conclusion – I Love You
Of course, the most powerful words to praise a grandchild is the heartfelt words, “I Love You!” In my opinion, it is impossible to shower any child with too much love!
Top Featured Photo by Adrià Crehuet Cano